I Feel Depressed & Lost All Drive & Purpose
after my spiritual awakening. What do I do to make myself normal again?
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I Don’t Feel Like Doing Anything After Awakening
After this awakening happened... I don’t feel like doing anything. I feel depressed and unable to connect with society. I lost all my drive and purpose. How am I supposed to live my life now that I’ve had this awakening?
The question above is one of the most common I hear from spiritual seekers, especially after they have had a glimpse of awakening. They don’t ask about God, the soul, or even life’s purpose. But why do they feel alienated from the world?
I understand and can deeply relate to them, as I have gone through a similar experience after my awakening in 2008. Throughout our lives, we've been seeking inner peace and fulfillment. Now that it’s here, suddenly our minds want something to do. Before, we longed for peace. When it arrived, our minds started to miss the chaos.
This happens because when a seeker catches a glimpse of reality, it shows the emptiness of everything we once believed was essential. That glimpse makes the whole game of life seem... hollow.
Where Did the Old Me Go?
Before realization, if you're sad, you paint. If you're anxious, you socialize. You did something. These strategies work for a while, but they only scratch the surface. The deeper pain remains because the core identity—the idea of being separate—stays intact.
We live in a world of duality.
So, when we're sad, we try to be happy.
If we're anxious, we seek comfort in the company of others.
When we're relaxing, the mind tends to be active.
The world is not about human beings; it’s about human doings.
But once awakening happens, that identity takes a hit. Duality collapse. Something cracks open. A hole appears in the structure of personality. Through that hole, the light of awareness activates your inner Being, your essence. Suddenly, who you thought you were no longer feels real. The roles you played don’t feel real either.
Then, the mind begins to protest these questions :
Why should I work?
Why should I feed the body?
Why should I support a family?
It's all meaningless.
Let me tell you, this is not your downfall. This is the final fight of the ego as it tries to adjust to a new reality. Previously, you were a prisoner in the palace of your mind. Awakening came and broke down some walls. Now, the prisoner is free but confused. That’s all.
The Mind Hasn’t Learn to Surrender Yet
This is the mind trying to find ground beneath its feet. But awakening is like pulling the rug out from under the ego. And the poor thing hasn’t learned to fly yet.
People will say, “If you're low, go dance. Take a walk. Try yoga.” These are not bad things. They are like giving candy to a crying child. But what the child really wants is not candy—it wants to be seen, to be held, and to experience the divine within.
The fundamental pain is not about “not feeling like doing anything.” It’s about the illusion of separation. Awakening punctures that illusion. Suddenly, the personality doesn’t feel so personal because your “separateness” is dissolving. Roles you played all your life now seem like costumes.
Many people get stuck in this, but it’s a misunderstanding of what this awakening means. Even in the Bhagavad Gita, Krishna says, "Inaction is not an option."
The mind will think, make a lot of noise, and search. But this doesn't mean you should follow it down every path. At some point, you have to let the mind settle. The best way to do that is to surrender your mind inward, withdrawing attention from the world. When you surrender, something deeper emerges—peace, harmony, and stillness.
Join: Surrender To Awaken Course (Limited Time Offer until July 4th)
The pain is in the conflict. The mind wants meaning, but it can’t grasp your deeper being, which holds all the meaning in the world if you realize it. So, what should you do?
Your surrender.Let the mind go wherever it wants. You stay present. You are not your mind, thoughts, or emotions. You are the awareness that observes it.
Whatever small action comes—cooking, walking, making a piece of art—do it. If it happens, good. If not, that’s fine too.
But observe. Watch how the mind comments on everything:
"Why cook, when I’m not the body?"
"Why read, when I’m not the mind?"
This is the mind trying to stay alive. It’s seen a glimpse of reality, and now it’s confused. And that confusion is not wrong. It’s part of the process.
But remember: Inaction is not possible. The body will move. The breath will happen. Something in you still wants to engage. But then the mind says, “What’s the point?” That’s the tug-of-war between two forces.
So, what to do?
Just engage in any simple activity with total surrender. Let that engagement in anything arise naturally. Dance if the body wants to. Sing. Write. And if nothing comes, then sit. But don’t buy into the mind’s judgment of it.
Don’t believe the mind. Don’t fight it either. Just observe.
Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj gave a beautiful analogy. He said:
“A dirty cloth placed in soapy water becomes clean by itself.”
Likewise, the mind begins to dissolve when you rest your mind within the Inner Being. And it becomes a surrendered mind. And a surrendered mind is a very powerful mind.
Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj also said
There is no such thing as peace of mind. Mind means disturbance; restlessness itself is mind.... Examine closely and you will see that the mind is seeing with thoughts. It may occasionally go blank, but it does it for a time and reverts to its usual restlessness.
The more you resist a feeling, the longer it stays. But if you allow it, let it dance, and then let it go, it returns to the source from where it came.
That source—that is what you truly are.
Thoughts, emotions, sensations—these are not you. They are just passing weather. After awakening, these movements of thoughts and emotions become unbearable.
What do I mean?
Before awakening, if anxiety came, you’d distract yourself with food, music, or a walk. Now after awakening, you dont feel like doing anything. Nothing works. So the anxiety stays. You feel helpless.
And the mind says, “You’ll destroy your life like this.” But that’s not true. That’s just fear. The mind is afraid it’s going to die. It wants to survive by doing and getting distracted.
The Power of Surrender
But what happens when you stop resisting thoughts, emotions, and sensations?
What happens when you let yourself be tired fully?
When, instead of shaming your lack of motivation, you sit with it, breathe with it, and listen to it?
Something shifts.
Not always instantly. But often, a small spark stirs: a creative thought, a gentle urge, a tiny impulse to move. That’s not forced motivation. That’s a God momentum. That’s the power of your inner Being.
Awakening is not a person’s achievement. It’s the dissolution of the separate entity called a person or personality.
Awareness is already whole. Already awake. The mind—what you call ‘you’—is just a “borrowed light” from the Real light of Being.
So, rather than finding a solution when your mind bothers you, observe your mind. Observe every movement. When you fight emotion, suffering increases. When you allow everything, suffering dissolves.
A common comment I hear is: “I was happier before awakening.” No—you weren’t. You were distracted. Now, you feel exposed, but within that openness lies the truth.
The mind says, “My life is ruined. I don’t feel like doing anything.” But that’s just the conditioning. Since birth, we’re trained to do, fix, and act. These are not bad things. But they keep the ego intact—the separate self that suffers.
Spontaneous Action Without a Doer
Slowly, as you observe all this, the mind starts to quiet. Actions become more conscious. Emotions are felt deeply, without resistance. Confusion fades. Clarity comes. Peace returns. And that peace is not a result of doing. It’s your natural state.
You begin to see that this idea of being a mind-body with a name is untrue. Awakening begins to dissolve that belief, and in its place, a deeper silence begins to shine.
At this point, even worries about money, family, or the future begin to loosen. Not because they’re unimportant, but because you realize—you are not the doer.
Just as awareness is moving you, it is moving others too.
You are not responsible for anyone’s happiness. And this is not selfishness. This is clarity. The greatest service you can do for the world is to awaken and realize your inner self.
Don’t try to change the world. First, see this moment.
Whatever is arising in you—watch it. Don't suppress it. Don't distract yourself. Let the emotion live fully. Be fully aware. That’s all.
Then life starts to look very different. It’s no longer parts and pieces. It’s one seamless happening. One living intelligence moving through all things. In that, you are not a cog in a machine. You are life itself.
Let the divine claim you. Let the outer purpose arise from your being. Let the goal own you fully. That is possible only when the goal is “God.” And then whatever actions arise from that awakened state will be your outer purpose in the world.
So yes, after awakening, there may be confusion. But don’t try to fix it. Just see it. That’s the ego’s last tantrum before it becomes quiet.
Eventually, ego understands that outcomes are beyond personal control and are governed by life itself. This realization doesn’t mean you should stop taking action. Keep acting—just don’t obsess over the results.
Maybe you want the confusion to go. But it won’t leave just because you want it to. Let it complete its dance. Let the sensation play out fully. Don’t resist. Don’t analyze.
Nisargadatta said: Rest in the bare feeling. Let it come. Let it pass.
If you fight, you build mental muscles, which keep the mind strong. But if you rest, you realize a new dimension—the creative mind. The creative mind is a surrendered mind that creates from a place of abundance within.
This is not the thinking mind. This is the creative intelligence. When it arises, action becomes spontaneous. The “why” and “what’s the point” disappear.
The creative mind is pure intuition that is just expressed. It is not bothered about results. If you’re painting, you become one with color, emotion, and expression. It doesn’t ask, “Will people like it?”
This is freedom.
Great artists and creators never wondered if their work would become famous. They wanted to express themselves. Their creative mind creates from inner silence and abundance.
That’s what starts to happen after awakening.
You begin to express yourself through writing, speaking, conscious business, art, or any other medium, without worrying about what people will think. That’s a creative life with total surrender to your inner higher power.
Allow your mind to settle in awareness and observe what unfolds. Let the divinity come through you in this world.
The Last Meditation: Awaken to God
“When you learn to surrender your mind inward in Inner Being with this article, the divine power takes charge of your life, and you discover that the mind and thoughts are not necessary for functioning in the world.”
Thank you. 🙏🏻
🙏🏽thank you very much for this .Just in time.