Your Suffering is Never Caused by The Person You Are Blaming
The End of Blame: Awaken To Your Inner Freedom
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The Illusion of Blame
"Your suffering is never caused by the person you are blaming."
The mind resists this truth. It wants to point outward, find fault, and blame others for pain. Yet suffering is never the result of another’s actions but of how the mind holds onto them—clinging to a story, reinforcing an identity rooted in past wounds.
Blame is seductive. It offers a false sense of clarity, a neat division between victim and offender. Blame provides a false sense of fulfillment that the problem is “outside of you”. But in reality, it keeps you trapped, bound to the very pain you wish to escape. The moment you blame, you unknowingly hand over your inner power, waiting for the other person to change, to apologize, to make things right. And so, suffering continues.
The Mind’s Story-Making Habit
The mind is a dramatic storyteller. It takes what happened and weaves it into a personal narrative, replaying scenes, justifying pain, fueling resentment. But these stories are not reality—they are interpretations, conditioned responses shaped by past experiences.
What if suffering does not arise from what someone did, but from how it is perceived and carried forward?
What if pain is real, but suffering is optional?
The End of Blame: Awaken To Your Inner Freedom
People will disappoint. They will misunderstand, act unfairly, fall short of expectations. This is the nature of human interaction.
People, shaped by their own conditioning, fears, and limitations, inevitably cause pain—sometimes knowingly, often unconsciously. They may judge without seeing, betray due to their toxic conditioning, or withdraw when their presence is needed most.
Yet, the real question is: Do I let this affect my life?
The true test is not in their actions but in our response. Do we react with resentment, reinforcing our own suffering?
What others say or do remains beyond our control and influence. It's like the weather that we can’t do anything about it. But your response, the emotions you carry, the meaning you assign to events, is entirely yours. This is where true power resides. The recognition that peace is not dependent on external circumstances, but on the depth of your own presence.
Their behavior is their karma, and how you stay unaffected by resting in your being is your karma.
“You can love someone and still choose not to be around them. You can bless someone greatly and still choose not to interact with them. You can care for someone and still be glad they are no longer a part of your life.”
Reclaiming Your Inner Power
Letting go of blame is not about justifying another’s behavior or denying hurt. It is about refusing to allow their behaviour to shape your future. It is seeing beyond the conditioned mind’s compulsion to react and instead recognizing the peace of God beneath all thoughts.
When blame dissolves, a shift occurs: life no longer happens to you but unfolds through you. There is no longer a need to fight against what is. Resistance falls away, and in its absence, peace naturally arises.
Two Types of Forgiveness
According to A Course in Miracles, there are two kinds of forgiveness:
Ego’s Forgiveness
You may think you are forgiving when you say, “I forgive you for your mistakes.” But this places you above others, making you feel wise and generous while reinforcing the belief that you were wronged. In reality, your ego uses forgiveness to maintain a sense of superiority and separateness.
Love’s Forgiveness
True forgiveness comes from Being. When you realize you are not the mind-body but eternal awareness, you see that no one has truly harmed you. What happened affected the body and mind, but NOT the essence of who you are.
From this understanding, forgiveness is not about pardoning others—it is liberation from the thinking mind by resting it in Being. Forgiveness is a gift to yourself. After all, no one can take away your peace—only you can.
The Path to Liberation
The question is not, How do I forgive?
But can I be conscious enough to see that there is nothing to forgive?
In that seeing, you step beyond the mind’s illusions. You discover that peace of God has never been elsewhere. It has always been here, beneath the noise of thought, waiting for you to become one with it.
And so, the choice is always now: to remain entangled in blame, or to awaken from the dream of suffering. “One path keeps you trapped. The other sets you free.”
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