Do This: Never Get Angry or Triggered by People

Stop Anger Before It Starts—Here’s How

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"My anger tends to flare up aggressively before I even realize it, and it's only after the outburst that I become aware of it. How can I develop the awareness to recognize when I'm getting triggered, so I can manage my response in the moment and stay in control?"

One of my counseling session participants asked me this question. It's a powerful question, and it affects everyone.

Managing Anger When You Get Triggered

Anger often emerges in our interactions—especially with people. Typically, we experience anger in two main areas:

1. Personal situations involving the family.

2. Professional settings, often triggered by work or colleagues.

Before we learn how to address anger in family interactions, let’s learn this ONE Practice of Becoming Peace Yourself

ONE Practice of Becoming Peace Yourself

The first step is learning to be present in everyday moments, not just when you're triggered.

Do this one thing, and it will make all the difference. All the time, let your mind surrender to your inner Being. Always withdraw your attention from the outer world and rest it in your inner Being. It means keeping your attention inside your inner body. The inner body can be your inner chest, abdomen, hands, or palms. Even you can even keep your attention on your breath. Keep a minimum of 50% of your attention inside you. More mature spiritual aspirants keep 80% of their attention within and give 20% attention to the outside World.

By staying fully present and connecting with inner Being this way, God will guide your actions, freeing you from overthinking. Intuition will replace thought, quieting compulsive thinking and allowing you to thrive with minimal effort. You'll radiate life energy that would otherwise be lost to overthinking and unconscious habits.

Dealing With Family, Children and Spouse

Be present by anchoring attention on your breath when you're with your family. If your children trigger you, take a conscious breath and reflect: What if they weren't here tomorrow? What if I wasn't here tomorrow? This isn't a negative thought—it's an acknowledgment of the impermanence of life. We are more than our bodies and minds; we are pure awareness. This practice immediately brings you into the present moment.

When you're truly present, you’ll feel the essence of your children, your spouse, and others in your life. Avoid labeling your children's actions, and simply observe with a state of focused attention. Maybe you embrace or hug them for a minute. Do that with your spouse too. See how it will transform them and yourself.

Dissolving Anger

As explained before, keep at least a minimum of fifty percent attention inside you or, if possible, eighty percent attention. If you are intensely present, only give twenty percent of your attention to the outside activity. As you practice this, presence will begin to emerge naturally. You may not catch your ego-driven anger immediately, but over time, the gap between the onset of anger and your awareness of it will shorten.

At first, you might recognize your anger just after it's surfaced. That awareness is key. Simply acknowledging, "My mind is angry," is powerful.

Suppressed energy, primarily characterized by anger, is closely related to the ego. When you become present to that suppressed energy within you, it dissolves and becomes awareness. The ego can only operate when you are unconscious of its patterns. As your presence grows, you'll notice your anger episodes and dissolve them more quickly.

Once you surrender your mind to your inner being, you will develop a silent powerful choice to engage differently, when anger arises in you rather than reacting unconsciously. This progress results from keeping your mind in Being and inviting presence into your life during everyday situations.

Connect With Nature & Dissolve Anger

The other Practice you can do is just be present in nature without the filter of naming it. Have you ever realized that when you look at a tree and label it as an "oak tree" or a "mango tree," your knowledge of its botanical name has so deeply influenced your perception that it acts as a barrier to truly experiencing the tree? To genuinely connect with the tree, you need to touch it, and the mere word won't assist you in making that physical touch."

Allow nature to teach you stillness. Remove the mental labels of naming it. For example, this is a rose flower, an oak tree, or a peacock. Be fully present when observing nature to deepen your connection to it. Nature appreciates your attention and recognizes itself through your awareness.

Being in nature without naming it, cultivates a more significant presence in your life, making it readily available to help manage your anger when it arises.

Managing Your Anger When You Are Involved Professionally

Now, let’s talk about professional triggers. Anger in the workplace often stems from two sources:

1. You dislike your work.

2. You like your work but struggle with the people around you—colleagues, bosses, or clients.

In the first case, where you don't like your work but have to work because you have family commitments, simply change how you do what you do. This means that how you do what you do is always more important than what you do!

It simply involves being more conscious of your work. Fully accept your work. Once you fully accept your work, the joy of your being will flow into it. Then, you will be inspired and enthusiastic about it. Simply change how you do what you do!

If you hate your work, find something else to do. It is not the right profession to emanate your consciousness. Slowly and steadily, keep your mind surrendered to your Being, and you will be helped by divinity to find a new work that resonates with your Being.

What to Do When You Get Triggered by Your Colleagues, Bosses, and Customers

If you love your work but are triggered by people—whether colleagues, bosses, or clients—practice acceptance. Transform yourself into a volunteer. Volunteering implies doing something willingly, without external pressure —no matter if they're financial or social.

The Art of Doing Work

Willingness is like volunteering. Willingness is at the core of your joy, regardless of the task's simplicity or complexity. When you willingly participate in an activity, it is a fundamental source of joy. Even the simplest task, when done willingly, can bring immense satisfaction.

Doing something with willingness means letting the divine will operate through you by connecting with your inner Being.

The distinction between heaven and hell lies in this very willingness. When you engage willingly, you experience joy; when you act unwillingly, you are in a state of suffering.

Are you compelled to read this article, or are you reading it willingly? Willingly, Right? Thank you for your willingness.

Be a very conscious participant in life.

Why Do People Swing Between Kindness and Rudeness?

It's essential to understand that people aren't inherently "good" or "bad." People can shift between different states of being based on their environment. If you create a joyful atmosphere for them, they will be kind; if you create an unpleasant atmosphere, they can be rude or angry.

Are you acting from unconsciousness or consciousness?

Labeling people as "good" or "bad" is problematic. Instead of passing judgment or potentially causing harm, we should create joyful environments that encourage positive behavior.

The Main Purpose of Your Life

Volunteering in your profession means being entirely willing, offering your life with no personal agenda. It's a state of complete acceptance. You're in control of your inner state, freeing yourself from external influences.
Your state of consciousness is the main purpose of your life. And once you commit to raising your consciousness by accessing your inner being, you will never get angry or triggered by people unconsciously.

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Whenever you are ready, I can guide you in three ways.

1. The Courage To Awaken: This course will help you stop oscillating between conscious and unconscious states of mind. It offers a direct path to spiritual awakening and realizing your True Self. The 14-day video course is designed for you to take at your own convenience.

2. 1-to-1 Private Counseling Session: In this session, we will discuss your life’s biggest challenge, struggle, or frustration and transform it for the better.

3. Life-Transforming Videos: My YouTube channel has all the videos that can transform your pain and suffering into inner peace.

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